I think about you EVERY single day. I long for you every single day. In a way, I almost feel….<<abandoned>>
Honestly, I'm still a little angry.
Angry at the fact that YOU were supposed to be here to walk me down the aisle when I got married. Selfish thought? It's honest. I'm angry that you brushed it off and said, "I don't have no cancer" when my mom first suspected it. I'm so hurt and ANGRY because I love you so much and there is absolutely nothing I can do to bring you back. You aren't here in the physical form anymore. I can never feel your arms around me ever again. I don't have you to call when I get stuck in the snow. I don't have you to run to and vent about my mother getting on my nerves (lol). I find myself experiencing a heightened sense of anxiety. I'm more prone to randomly lashing out on friends. And, being alone terrifies me. I just need you back.
I just miss you.
Frustrated? Yes, but I know you loved me unconditionally. I never had to question that. My fondest memory of you growing up is of me being beyond excited when you picked me up from school, because you were the cool parent and you always brought me a "treat" to snack on of my liking. Couldn't no one tell me my father wasn't cool. Yes, you had your flaws, but who doesn't? You were always there when I needed you. And for that I am forever grateful for the handsome man God chose to make MY father. See you later Mr. Wiley.
Love you always,
-L