Legacy Official: Women's Month Pop-Up Shop

I’m still on a high from my first vendor opportunity at Legacy Official’s Women’s Month Pop-up Shop last week! I just want to start by saying that MANIFESTATION IS REAL. People use that word a lot, but this was a wild experience of seeing it happen FAST. When Erica invited me to be a vendor at the event, I had less than two weeks to prepare and I had nothing tangible to sell. The week before, I had just talked to my friend Jessica about wanting to invest in building an inventory. Between Erica and Jess, they pushed me to get it done. No excuses.

So I got my head in the game and decided to figure it out. I wanted to at least sell shirts, skincare gift cards and candles. And I’m proud to say that I worked with all black owned businesses to make it happen.

First, I called Nesha from The Village to design gift cards for skincare service. She does all of our design strategy and helps me bring my ideas to life. I just can’t say enough about how much I love working with her. She also used to do our screen printing, but she’s on to bigger and better things as a web designer.

So I had to find a new screen printing business and she recommended The Work Spot at Boxville. Reached out to them and immediately got good vibes from William who I believe is one of the owners. This time instead of sweatshirts, I decided to get long sleeve tees made for Spring. Both the YIN and The Outsiders Monogram tee. Luckily, he could get it done in time. But when I got there, we started talking about options and I decided to get some hats made too! Because of the rush job and there was no time for samples before printing the full run of shirts, I actually didn’t end up liking the way the monogram shirts came out. I was mad at first, but then William came up with a really good solution for how to save them. Can’t wait to show you guys soon!

Now for candles…I was already working with my friend Naja from Skin Glory Organics who has a candle wholesale business to finalize my first scent selections. I honestly wasn’t planning to move forward this quickly. But when we had our scheduled meeting to discuss it and she told me she could have the samples ready by the following week, I couldn’t pass it up. I got three candle scents made: Power, Perspective and Peace. Then I had to circle back to Nesha to get candle labels designed.

It was a busy week but we got it done! I’m definitely a bit of a perfectionist so there are a few things I would’ve preferred to be different but we did it! My sister and I planned it all out and I had everything I wanted to sell. Sunday 3/27 came around and it was go time!

The event got started and soon enough, people were showing up to shop. Turned out that almost everbody that came to support me wore their Outsiders shirts! I didn’t even ask anybody to do that except the “staff”, my mom and sister. But it made me feel so good. The Outsiders crew came thru!

I loved our setup. And people did a fair amount of shopping! I also got a few new skincare clients out of it.

I saw myself making money back on my investment. And not only that, I saw people at the event and even online starting to pay attention and show genuine appreciation for what I’m doing. THAT was the goal.

But I had more stuff to sell. I got home and realized I needed to set up retail space in my spa suite. This was another idea Jessica threw out. It was happening! I moved some things around and set up candles, hats, shirts and gift cards. And I’ve sold products with every since service since! It feels good because people aren’t just buying to be supportive, they’re buying because they want what I’m selling. My vision is getting bigger everyday. I can really see a lot of things that felt separate coming together and it feels magical. It feels right.

I spent every dime I made on skincare services in March pouring right back into the business. I can already see it paying off. And this is still just the beginning!

xo,

Ness

It Was Time

12 years ago, I took a leap of faith and started my Locs. This was one of the first big decisions that I can remember where I really felt I was being true to my vision for myself. I had to face my fears and stand strong on my decision even with the criticism from friends and family. They couldn’t see MY vision for myself. And while that was tough sometimes, it did show me that nobody else can make decisions for me. I had the power to create the life I wanted.

I was 20 years old when I started my locs and I’m turning 32 next month. Just like my hair, I have grown so much. About a year ago, I started to think about combing my locs out but I wasn’t ready. I couldn’t see myself any other way. And when I started talking to family and friends about it, most people’s reactions showed me that they felt the same way. My locs were a part of me.

It took me a while to realize that it was fear that was stopping me. The same fear that has limited me in other areas of my life. The fear that makes you forget that this world has ENDLESS possibilities. And many times we’re so stuck on one or two things that we don’t see all that life has to offer.

But still, I wasn’t ready. I started saying maybe I’ll do it after I get married or after I have another kid. Maybe I would do it when I turned 35. I was procrastinating and I didn’t know what would lead me to make the change.

On Wednesday April 7th, my friend and client Aleya came in for services. While we were catching up, we talked about my hair and I remember telling her I was kind of over it but not ready for a change just yet. That night, I had a dream about the process of taking my locs out and it ended with Venita being half way through blow drying my hair. When I woke up the next morning, I knew it was time.

I started combing my locs out that day. I didn’t watch any tutorials or tell anybody other than my sister. Not even Steven and he was in the next room. I just started combing. I had no idea what the outcome would be, but that day, I opened my mind to new possibilities for myself. #OperationLocDown (as Venita calls it) was underway. I wondered for a moment, should I wait and do a photo shoot with my locs for memory’s sake. But I decided against it. I was ready to move forward.

For the next 5 weeks, I spent every free moment I had working on my hair. I had 76 locs to comb out. At first it was taking me almost 2 hours per loc, but eventually I was able to get it down to about 45 minutes each. After a week and a half, I was having severe carpal tunnel symptoms. I was afraid that I wouldn’t even be able to continue, especially after watching my sister’s journey through carpal tunnel with time off work and surgery. I was nervous, but my mom pushed me the same way she always has, to finish what I started.

In order to keep going, I knew I would need help. But the process was so tedious and messy that I didn’t even want to ask. I started icing my hand in between sessions and taking advil when I needed it. I even had to sleep in wrist braces. And then I had to ask for Steven’s help. I never really understood when girls would say their boyfriend helped them take out their weave or braids, until now lol. It’s definitely a new level of bonding.

I still needed more help. I was nervous to ask any of my friends because most of them keep their nails done and I knew it would mess them up. And I was also only available at odd times because of school and work. But two of my best friends, Candace and Lauren, were adamant about helping me and I could not be more grateful. Candace even brought gloves so she could help without sacrificing her nails. They came over on a couple Sundays and one Monday to help me make this happen.

I had a strict deadline because of an upcoming girls trip and I refused to look crazy. Venita and I agreed that I should get braids for the trip. It removed some of the pressure of wondering what the outcome of my hair would be and thinking about how I would manage it on vacation. So I scheduled two hair appointments. The first one was to get a blow out and trim with Venita. And the second one was to get braids the following day.

I was surprised that I didn’t really get emotional throughout the process of combing them out. But suddenly it hit me when I was on my way to the salon. A rush of emotions came over me and I cried for the next couple hours. The feeling was heavy and intense. It was uncontrollable. But at the same time it was cleansing. I started to feel the change that was coming in my life and welcome it.

Venita and I both went through a range of emotions as we undid my two strand twists and detangled my hair. We even had a small argument and sat there silently brushing for 15 minutes. We were overwhelmed. Candace and Lauren sat there to support no matter how heavy the energy got. Austin was there to lighten the mood.

Venita washed my hair and conditioned my hair and then gave me a protein treatment. I started to feel the weight lifting from my spirit and the tears stopped. I could feel myself being born into a new era.

I was also excited because I had (sadly) NEVER seen my hair in it’s true, natural state. I’ve had a relaxer since I was three years old and didn’t even grow it out fully before getting locs.

Although we were impressed with my afro, we were still managing expectations about what the end result would be. Venita wasn’t even planning to straighten it.

But then she started blow drying my hair and were SO impressed with what we saw. My hair was long AND it was healthy. And not only that, it look exactly how I saw it in my dream. This was literally a dream come true 😭.

So the rest of my time at the shop was spent celebrating, on IG Live, and calling friends and family. I was so excited! I felt light and stress free. I was grateful and happy.

I meant it when I said I needed the weight off of me. I meant that in a physical sense, but I had no idea that it would really impact me spiritually.

When I left the salon, I dropped Austin off with my brother and went out and had a blast that night! I was celebrating a friend’s birthday but also celebrating the new me! The woman that had faced her fears and seen first hand that life can be even more beautiful than you imagined when you follow your intuition and take big risks. I took my new hair out on the town.

And then the next morning, I dragged myself to my braids appointment with Dominique. I didn’t even want braids anymore after seeing my hair, but I had to stick with the plan. I knew I wanted to get a style that didn’t just look like a replacement of my locs. I wanted something that felt new and different. After 12 years with the same hair, I was ready to do something unexpected. And here’s where we landed! LOVE it.

And not only did I love my hair, but I swear my appointment was like a therapy session. I left there feeling like my whole life was figured out. And most importantly, I was reminded of my potential and my ability to keep putting plans in place to build the life I want.

I can’t wait to keep trying different styles with my hair! I know there will be some struggles as I figured out what works best for my natural hair but I’m so ready.

I thank God for bringing me to and through this transformative time in my life. Change is good.

xo,

Ness

Waiting for Austin

Almost 8 months that he's been here with me, growing with me every day. Pregnancy has been such a transformative experience for me, both mind and body. I know that life is about to change so drastically and I feel like I'm ready (as ready as you can be anyway). I have felt so much more peace during my pregnancy than I've felt in the last few years. I know Austin was sent to bring us joy and healing. We can't wait to meet him!

I just want to say thank you to Steven for being such a supportive partner and staying by my side to reassure me every step of the way (even when I'm getting on your nerves lol). Thank you to my sister for EVERYTHING over the past several months and for anticipating Austin like he's your own. 

Thanks to my friends who have been so supportive and understanding even when I'm being distant. I know I've been in my own world but I love you guys so much. 

Thank you, Bianca, for an amazing shoot! I can't wait to look back on these photos for years to come. Oh and for any expecting moms wondering about skin care, I've been using Sacred Skin belly butter since the very beginning and LOVE it (Thanks, Kendra!). 

Best Friends For-ev-er

Lauren and I just had our 10 year high school reunion. Official grandma status. I was on the committee, so although I was excited, my main goal was to support our class president (Go, Jill!) in making it all happen. I was going through the motions. 

As the reunion got closer, we got more and more excited for the weekend of events. We had friends coming in town, we knew we would see old friends from Poms, there was an open bar (which was exciting for most -___-). 

The weekend came and went. It was a blast! One of the things people kept mentioning is "It's not like we haven't seen each other." We are blessed to still be really close with so many of our friends from back in the day. But still in the moment, I was taking it all for granted. 

It wasn't until I got a chance to reflect in the following week that I realized how blessed we are to still be holding on to high school relationships. As usual, people asked me how my weekend was and what I did. When I told people about the class reunion, I got a lot of strange looks and negative comments. People were telling me they had no interest in seeing people from high school or had lost touch completely. I thought about how all of our parents tried to prepare us, telling us that we wouldn't still be friends with the same people after high school. They're right about mostly everything, but I'm so glad there were wrong about this.  

We haven't always been perfect to each other and we haven't always agreed. But we have been there for each other nonstop for 15+ years. We know each other to our core. We have done funerals, weddings, homecomings, birthdays, vacations, girls nights, movie nights, beach nights, get togethers, tattoo nights, nights out, nights in. The list goes on and on and on. There's nothing like that kind of love. 

[SIN]SES - My Latest Escape

Meet Bloom. I don't usually post about music, but have to admit that I was so moved by her [SIN]SES EP that I had to tell someone. And when I say moved, I mean it took me into a totally different mind space. A different world. It felt like I was following her on an emotional roller coaster through passion and pain, a true escape. It's fiery and bone chilling at the same time. And the visuals that accompany it are the perfect articulation of what went on in my mind while listening to the EP. The artistic synergy feels so raw and honest. 

I'll admit, I've been watching and admiring Bloom from a distance for quite some time now. I met her at Columbia about 8 years ago and although we never spent a ton of time together, she always had such a magnetic energy. When I met her, she had locs. The most amazing locs I had ever seen in person. I loved them. I wanted them for myself and knew that she could start them, but for so long I was too nervous so I admired hers from afar. 

One day, after a year of growing out my relaxer and a humid three months of summertime Chi, I mustered up the courage start my locs and luckily she was available! It was the week before she moved back to St. Louis, so it left me no time for doubt. I had to take the leap! 

7.5 years ago now! 

With Bloom (then Kalyn to me) as my loc goals, I continued to follow her journey thanks to social media. I think the most impressive thing about her over the years (again, from a distance) was her versatility. By the time I got really comfortable with my locs, she had combed hers out and had the cutest fro!

And the transformation didn't stop there! Before I could get too attached to the afro, she cut it all off! There seemed to be something so cleansing and empowering about her ability to detached from her hair. To evolve. 

See for yourself. You can listen to the [SIN]SES EP here and watch the video for Raindrops below. 

And it sounds like there's so much more to come. More videos and another project in the works! Follow @thebloomexperience for updates and information. 

Kalyn, I am so excited to see you walking in your purpose and blooming into such an amazing artist. Wishing you the best on the journey ahead. 

-Ness

NYE 2017

NYE has always been a big deal for our group of friends. We used to rent a hotel room every year and have a party that inevitably got shut down. Last year we went out, spent tons of money on tickets, and only ended up having an OK time. So we decided that enough is enough and we were going to "stay in" this year. But if you know us, you know we can't live without a party so we decided to have Midnight Brunch at my place and it turned out to be such a good time! We made shrimp and grits, chicken and waffles, salmon croquettes, and hash brown casserole. It was so much fun that the party extended through the entire next day. We're in recovery mode to say the least. Here are some pics from before, during, and after the party! 

Before...

During...

Annnnnd the morning after...

Meet Jovan

We always say that meettheoutsiders.com is not just about other people meeting us, it's also about us meeting fellow Outsiders. We met Jovan, a Chicago-based creative, at our launch party and were so refreshed when we heard her latest music, The Conscious EP. She raps about social media and self-validation, inner city youth, and the progression of Black Americans (which is our favorite part!). The visual EP is a reintroduction of Jovan as a hip hop artist, filmmaker, and photographer. Her music has an interesting and nostalgic vibe that's different than anything we've heard from female rappers in a while. Keep it coming, Jovan! 

Click the cover below to listen and download The Conscious EP. Also, click HERE to watch the music video for Social Media Girls - shot and edited by Jovan. 

Meet Lynsey Ann

I am so excited! Not only for Lynsey to perform at Outsiders Only, but to see how inspired she is to use her gift. Such an interesting and unapologetic soul. She's one of our very best friends. Many people who know us also know her, or so they think. Watch the interview below to learn a little bit more about Lynsey Ann the person, the feminist, the vocalist. To see her perform live this Saturday in Chicago, RSVP below. 

Meet The Franchiise

Brand manager by day, DJ by night. Meet Francesca, aka The Franchiise (@thefranchiise), who will be DJing at Outsiders Only next Saturday. She's truly following her passion and KILLING IT. Watch the interview below to learn more about her journey. You can also click the link to RSVP for Outsiders Only below. 

Paint & Sip: Home Edition

So...I like painting. And I like sipping. But what I don't like about traditional Paint & Sip classes is that you have to paint the same corny painting as everyone else in the class. For me its fun in the moment, but I usually don't want the painting once I'm done. So my friend Tiffany and I (Happy Birthday, Tiff!) decided to have our own paint night at home. So much fun! I haven't painted in a while so it was refreshing and inspiring. I loooovvvvve the way my painting turned out. It's nothing like what I was actually trying to paint, but it's perfect. We're thinking about doing it again with a slightly bigger group.

I guess the only downside was that this wasn't actually a class and there wasn't a teacher present. Talk about trial and error...but I think that made it more fun. Thanks, Tiff for pushing me to follow through instead of procrastinating for months. Can't wait for our next paint sesh. 

@tiboni_

-Ness

Great reads!

I once saw both of these books listed on a blog that was recommended for women. I can't say why I chose these two, but I'm certainly glad I'm did! 

Werk by Koereyelle DuBose is much like a handbook on getting your life together. I absolutely LOVE that it also includes health tips with natural remedies listed for certain health benefits and issues. Her book also includes subjects such as working on your etiquette, investing in yourself, giving up nasty habits, and how to become your own boss. I have a number of placeholders to help me reference pages where I have written down my goals and taken notes on the life advice given. Some of my favorite sayings from her book are:

"A game-changer doesn't live by the rules. She creates her own."

"Turn your pain into a paycheck"

"No means not yet"

"Wealthy people don't work for people"

-Werk by Koereyelle Dubose

Another must read for women is Girl Code by Cara Alwill Leyba. This book is definitely another eye opener. I learned how to change my way of thinking in terms of success and dealing with the world around me. She points out that we as women feel the need to compete; when in actuality, there is enough room for everyone to be successful because we all have something unique to offer. There is more power in numbers. She also talks about how to remain authentic in your work, being original and not copying others, and finding your inspiration. 

Both books encourage being your own boss and not letting others tell you that your ideas aren't realistic. This is out of fear that others have. Don't let their fears hinder your goals. Check them out and let us know what you think!

-L

Organize.

Return of the Black Kings. This is not a clothing line, it's a movement. 

A couple weeks ago, my twin sister and I had the pleasure of participating in the look book shoot for RBK.

I want to start by saying that when I met Julian Gilliam (Artist and creator of the RBK Movement) in 2012, Return of the Black Kings was already an idea of his (Shoutout Marcus Graham Project c/o 2012, Think Fruition). I always thought it was a powerful concept, but must say that I'm impressed by the way it has developed over the years.

We've been talking about the launch for a while now, but our last conversation gave me a much deeper understanding of the message these jackets represent.

Organize. - The encouragement of collaboration among individuals with different skill sets, from different communities, with diverse perspectives. This is what RBK is all about. It was obvious in the way that the look book came about, but will be even more evident in the fruits of the Organize. movement that pledges to provide exposure and education, giving members of our community a line of sight into the endless possibilities.

The Inspiration - History continues to repeat itself. We've seen it in history books and we see it in our lives today. While anger and retaliation is an understandable reaction to the oppression we're constantly faced with, it is time to take a more strategic approach. "We've got to stop looking for answers and start creating them. We need to Organize." 

Notice, the RBK panther doesn't look as fierce and angry as the original Black Panther Party logo. He’s much more calm. "It's not about being emotional, it's about being strategic."

So, what's next?

First, more jackets. Proceeds from the first round of sales will go toward creating more jackets. The goal is to spread the word and have as many people wearing them as possible to attract the attention of the young. We need their ears, their attention, their influence. "The revolution has always been in the hands of the young." -Huey. P. Newton

Second, and equally as important, take action. Julian's mission is to create a platform to inspire action and invite anyone who is interested to join, collaborate, educate, encourage, empower, liberate. "We can't continue to just put a bandaid on a bleeding wound."

Join the movement. For more info, updates, and to purchase the Organize. jacket, visit RBK.life

“This is not a one-off. This is life.”

What do you have on?

I often times get asked..."What do you have on? That smells so good!".

Well here are my three staples if you're interested in knowing. Intense by Dolce & Gabbana is my number one choice.  In my opinion, it has a subtle smell that always seem to grab at least one persons attention through out the day. It's nice, soft, and fiery sweet....if you get what I mean lol. It is probably my absolute favorite.

My next two favorites are Sexy Amber by Michael Kors and Chanel No 5. Both have somewhat of a powdery undertone to them...but each still has a distinctive scent.

I most certainly hate super strong perfume. So if you prefer something a little more soft in terms of scent that is not so harsh to the nose...check these out. I always get compliments on these gems!

-L

Thoughts?

What would you like to see more of from your favorite outsiders?

Comment below or e-mail us at meettheoutsiders@gmail.com !

Become part of the movement.

Moving Foward

 I officially have seven tattoos. Crazy. I vowed to stop two tattoos ago lol. But There's such a beauty in expressing yourself through this type of art. Each tattoo I have has such significant meaning behind it. It's all apart of MY journey at different moments through out my life. I remember exactly where I was, who I was with, and any tied emotions at the time whenever I went to get "new ink".

Yesterday I decided to get two tattoo's. One on my wrist and the one in the picture above. I love this tattoo. I love it simply because it is a reminder that in life there will be things to set me back, get me down, or disappoint me... but I will always move forward and only forward. Always moving forward with improvement in velocity, direction, and focus. 

...... in that order lol.

-L

Happy Valentine's Day: Flowers for the Living

Speaking of Valentine's Day and speaking of following through...couldn't help but to congratulate Harold Green and the "Flowers For the Living" team on another amazing series! 

One of the first times in recent years that I got over my fear of not being good enough was when Harold and Excell trusted me and my brother enough to produce the 2011 Flowers for the Living series. I was a senior at Columbia studying TV Writing and Production, so I was well equipped to do a project like this, but still very nervous. If it was up to me I probably would've backed out. But my brother wasn't having it, which led to the start of Raggedie Ann productions. FFTL was the first of many projects we worked on with them. Talk about trial and error...

But I was in love with the finished product. Still love going back and watching the videos today. Take a look at one of my favorites from our 2011 series and one from the latest below.

-Ness

FFTL 2011

Day 14 of Harold Green's(@HaroldGreen) Flowers for the Living 2011. For the last day Harold teams up with The Ones (Yaw & Khari Lemuel), Charisma (@TheGrandeDiva), Stephen Styles (Drums), and Marcus Sims (Keys) to do a cover of Nina Simone's Spell on You. Shot and Edited by Raggedie Anne Productions.

FFTL 2016

Flowers For The Living 2016, Day 14: Our rendition of "We Are One" by Maze ft. Frankie Beverly Enjoy, comment, and share! #FFTL2016 Harold Green - @haroldgreen Charisma Sweat-Green Shot by- Kamal Kiddo http://www.haroldandthebeard.com Available for download at: https://soundcloud.com/haroldgreen